Football

Ah, football. Guaranteed to take your mind off injuries, work and Room 101. This is where I was on Saturday...

Bright sunshine, blue sky, a winter's day and the finest example of the beautiful game: Union Street FC v North Oxford Reserves, in the RT Harris City League Division One. The location? The magnificent Sandy Lane, Oxford. The home of football. Kind of. Note: fully-engorged gas tower, low-key dressing rooms and U.S.F.C warming up.

More of that funky sunshine. Jumpers for goalposts, the thrill of the chase, balls in the air, long throw-ins... Kinda warms the heart, doesn't it?

Our bored goalkeeper Danny Kavanagh. See the gas tower a bit closer up. That's Tesco's car park just behind there, you know.

Danny K clears his lines. Nice action shot, eh? Rather pleased with that. My hands was bleedin freezin though. Should've taken my gloves if I wanted to take photos, shouldn't I?

Ol' Rich 'straight leg' Adams chases for the ball with some other folk. Just so you know, the mighty Union Street won 7 - 1, which is pretty much unheard of. When I started playing for them we were more likely to lose 10 - 0 than win anything. Shows how things change, eh? Hmmm?

The knee's hurting a bit, and the docs should really warn you that losing a bit of hamstring really HURTS afterwards. I'm really paranoid that I'm going to do something that ruins the new ligament. I'm walking around with straight legs (bit like Rich above) and hoping that it doesn't twist and break again. I'll find out if the op has worked for sure in a few weeks...

Stags

Today's rant: why are stag dos so over the top these days? Time was (admittedly not in my time) when a few beers down the pub, followed by something suitably embarrassing involving dressing up / stripping / dodgy nightclubs would suffice. Now people want a whole weekend, usually abroad, with water sports, karting, shooting and all manner of expensive shenaniganery on top. I've been invited on one today and I really I want to go to see the ol' blighter off in style, but I just can't afford it (Berlin, flights, hotel, nightclubs etc). Ho hum.

If I ever get married, my stag do would look something like this:
(all times subject to change)
12.00 pm: meet at the Swan for initial round of Guinness, whisky and singing
2.00: epic game of football with the Street and mates on Sandy Lane
4.00: epic rendition of Hail Hail in the Lane showers
4.30: retire to the Swan to see how the Town got on
5.00: pub snacks (cheese, bits of lukewarm pie) provided by Dick
6.00: more Guinness, whisky and maybe even some Limoncello
7.00: pizza and tiramisu
8.00: get the badger costumes, banjos, guitars, harmonicas, triangles, maracas and child drum kits out
9.00: sing, shout, dance, boogie
10.00: amusing round of drunken speeches
11.00: maybe get that rough stripper from Martin's 50th to do her, err, bit
12.00 am: run down Cowley Road in badger costumers, jumping on nearest available post box
2.00: epic group-performance of Golden Slumbers involving aforementioned instruments
3.00: stumble down the high street, frightening students with ferocious singing and badger impersonations
3.30: arrange traffic cones in amusing shape on Carfax
4.00: pass out in neighbour's garden, cheesy chips on lap, very drunk and very happy.

What more could you possibly want? Eh?